Photo by Lina Trochez on Unsplash
Values, how to find them
Make better decision and have a healthier life
Have you ever been in your life either personal or professional that you needed to make a decision but you really didn’t know what to do? Why are you working so hard to finish your university? Why do you get up every morning and go for a 1h run? What are you hoping for?
These are questions about values - what for a given person is a compass in life, what he cares about, what he strives for, and what makes the most important decisions. It can be, for example, health, family, personal development, helping (people, animals), protecting (human rights, nature, climate), social life etc. What is important, that all these values will have a different, personal meaning for every single person and every single person will pursue their values in different ways. There is no good or bad way of living according to your values. What is essential is to know what core values we have in our life.
I often talk about my values in my videos and I thought that this article maybe can help some of you to better understand what I mean when I talk about my values and why it is so important to find your core values. I will tell you my core values and give you tips on how to find yours.
So once again - what are core values? Values are descriptions of your character, what you are like and how you behave. Core values hold strong no matter what, especially in times of high stress or difficult situations. Values are really who you are. As a person, for example, it says how much you are willing to accept some unpleasant situations in your life, it says what kind of life you can’t live and what conditions in life you will agree. Values are like your internal GPS - it really tells you what to do. Everything you do and make decisions is guided or filtered through your values.
We all have values, some people don’t need to ask themselves about values because they know them and live life in accordance with them. Most of the time things are right for us and even in difficult situations we still manage. Like looking for a job and being rejected 6 times doesn't mean that I give up, I know what this difficult time is about and I know that it is part of the process to get a job I will be happy about. I value my professional development and I know exactly what kind of job I want and I know that sooner or later I will get a job even if I often ask myself why I bother to change a job, for what this headache?
But sometimes for some people things don’t work, they earn good money but they are not happy in their job, maybe because this career is not their value or maybe they don’t value money that much as a simple and stress free life?
That’s why it is extremely important to know what your values are because in difficult situations they simply give you strength and help you make hard decisions.
With values often happens that it is relatively easy to tell what your values are, for example if you say my value is my family, or social life, but just saying it doesn’t mean that you live in accordance with your value.
Realizing values in your life is acting in accordance with them, not just thinking about them. And this is the reason why everyone should sit down, maybe these first days of new year are perfect for some reflections and to get to know your core values.
Like I said before, values can be anything, like family, children, adventures, happiness, ambitions, being rich, respect, fit etc etc etc. If you are still not sure, see the list of values below:
You can find a list of 100 values or more. But here is a trick.
Values are something you live by, not what you wish or think that you do. Also like everything in life things have hierarchy, so for example if on the top 5 of my values there is no kindness it doesn't mean that I don’t value kindness. I do, but I value my happiness more, so that’s why it is important to sit down and reflect about your life. Choose from the list of values which I link in description or feel free to use any helpful guidance you wish. Select max 10 values and think about your life, are all these things equally important to you? I chose:
Family Financial Security Love of career Learning Diversity Freedom Balance Gratitude Happiness Health
I think that choosing max 10 is not that difficult, what is now difficult is to decrease this list to max 5 values. Here is something called the “Litmus Test” which can help you verify if things you chose are really things you want. Ask yourself questions: Am I ready to sacrifice these values for £1M? Would I sacrifice these in times of stress? Will I still have these values in 20-50 years? Let’s see: Will I care about love of career or freedom in 20 years? Probably not, so I simply cross out these as well as gratitude as this is something I can include in mental health. So without further ado here are my 5 core values: Family - this is the most important thing in my life, my family keeps me going and makes me a happy person and I don’t know where I would be in my life without them.
Financial Security - I don’t live in the house of my parents and they don't sponsor me, so I work really hard to have my financial security, I pay my mortgage and provide for my family and yes, finances are important for me, this is basics to have a palace to live and put a bread on the table.
Health - mental and physical health, I talk about that a lot. Being healthy is our choice, things we eat, how we sleep, how stressful our life is have a huge impact on our health and staying healthy. Walking, cycling, jogging are really important for me.
Learning - my job is constant learning, it’s like being a doctor to need to stay up to date all the time. But all things in life, like books, movies, visiting museums, traveling abroad - all these things help me learn new things. But also learning new things in life like this youtube channel, where teach me every day from making videos, editing, equipment like all these technical things, marketing but also intellectual, how much I learn when I prepare every video and how much I learn from all of you, who find the time to comment and say your opinion or share things from your life. Youtube is an amazing tool to learn about things. Open minded - all these learning lead me to be a better person, non judgmental but curious about things. I think that it is very important for me that I try to see every situation from the perspective of a different person and not filter through me. Trying to understand things around me is very important for me and I really wish that I will stay an open person in 20 years when my kids will visit me and I will try to accept their life and learn more about things. Being curious about things we don’t understand and wanting to learn about that is very important for me.
There is no one else, only us live our life and knowing what we value most is so important, we are in charge of our life. Knowing your values gives you clarity in making decisions, like values are your criteria and life is simpler if you know your core values. Live life intentionally and on your own terms, not according to someone else's values. I encourage you to make this simple test and set up your values. I always say that knowledge is power and knowing yourself, what your values are, what makes you happy and when to say NO is probably the most important things in life. This is the best gift you can give yourself this year, so I am asking you if you knew about your core values and if not then maybe this artilcle was helpful for you. Adios!